Ten things I have learned as I turn 31.

In a couple of weeks, I turn 31. Its an odd year. At 30, I had the mindset that I was just barely out of my twenties. I basically was still 29, with a few days added. At 31, I feel far less like a kid. The past few weeks, I have been doing a lot of reflecting. Reflecting on my life, and what I have learned. Asking myself, "What does it mean to be a man?" But not just a man, a good man. A man who walks in integrity. A man who is gentle enough to cuddle with his wife and kids, but tough enough to kill a bear with his bear hands, (see what I did there?)
These are ten things that I have learned in the past 31 years. Most, in the last 5. Although these are all things I am deeply convicted about, I am a man who is in process. In no way have I perfected these or feel that I can sit on a moral high stool preaching down to others. I am a deeply flawed man who strives to be more like Christ. The order does not reflect the importance.

1. Leadership is always earned, it can never be demanded or forced. Until people respect you, they will never follow you.

2. Always admit when you are wrong, especially to your children. Not only will they learn to admit when they are wrong, but they will admire your humility and courage.

3. Always lead by example. If you want your co-workers to work hard, work hard yourself. If you are in a leadership role, always set the example and pace.

4. The most difficult times in your life, will always give you the biggest chance to grow as a person. In trying times, always look for ways to grow.

5. If you cheat your way to success or victory, it means very little. Work hard, get better, and you will feel great about your accomplishments.

6. Remember you are always in process, when you make a mistake, learn from that mistake.

7. Although it is okay to make time for yourself, and at times, its a must, life is about sacrifice. Give your life to others. Living life solely for oneself is a terrible way to live life.

8. Happiness comes and goes, but you will be surprised how happy you become when being happy is not your primary goal. I have seen horribly selfish acts committed when people have the philosophy, "I have the right to be happy."

9. Morality does not shift with the culture. Seek truth and walk in it. If you are engaged in the culture like you should be, you may have to walk in your moral endeavors alone.

10. Although I believe it is crucial to be self aware, knowing your flaws and weaknesses as a person, we are under grace. Walk in the grace that Christ has put you in. He has promised to work out all things in you.

Perhaps in the next 31 years I will come up with another 10 things I've learned, but until then, these will have to suffice. Keep pressing forward, always learning, always growing.